I went to get shoes for my friend’s wedding and on my way home from getting them, I hit a bunny.  I didn’t have a choice.  I couldn’t swerve into oncoming traffic and there was some who was right behind me.  I felt awful and all the stuff that I’ve been going thru over the past couple of months just came up all at once. That poor bunny lead to a flood of awful thoughts and kept me up most of the night.  I went to bed around 11 and woke up around 1:30/2am, and I couldn’t get back to sleep after that.  So today was a very, very long day.  Thankfully, I called a friend right after I hit that poor little bunny and he listened to me vent and cry and get down on myself and he told me that he was proud of me and that helped me more than I can say.

I’m in the middle of trying to change 30 some odd years of bad habits, mainly relating to how I deal with money and relationships.  I’m fortunate enough to have the friends and family that I do.  I love them all very much and I don’t know what I’d do without them.  I’m also very lucky to have such incredibly strong female role models in my life – my mom and my grandmas.  Knowing that I have such a support group, makes it easier for me to deal with these moments.  Everyone doubts themselves at some point.  I guess yesterday was that day for me.  I feel much better today.  I’m just tired and I plan on getting a full nights sleep tonight.